Recently, I’ve been reflecting back on a day last summer when I decided to pop into one of my favorites places for a quick solo dinner at Lido in Harlem.
I was sitting at the bar, having my usual mussels and sangria, when I happened to notice a young woman who looked familiar. We ended up having a few drinks and talking about everything from our careers to love. At the end of the night, we exchanged information and about a month later I received an email from her thanking me for talking to her and listening.
Turns out, she was having a really depressing day because she was lonely and missing her life back home.
When I think about this story, I think about the fact that since I became a Doula I’ve experienced some of what I would like to call mean girl behavior. Unfortunately, this isn’t the first time that I’ve been in a situation where I’m expected to give love and have someone else leaning on me.
The church is another place where people can make the journey of servicing the community difficult. I was in church one afternoon feeling really sad. At the time, I was homeless and pregnant when Church member decided to give me a little shade.
The woman who I met at Lido has a huge social media platform based on self-love and showing women how to love themselves, even though she was having a down and sad day herself.
The moral of the story is, as women we have an obligation to support and nurture, and love one another. All these insecurities come from an attitude of lack, of thinking that there is not enough in the world but there really is.
When you realize that God only created one of you and no one can do what you do, the way you’re doing to do it in this world you’ll be okay with complimenting and sharing your space with other women and clapping for them when they are receiving the light because you know your winning season is coming!
3 ways to support other women:
- I go out of my way to speak to other women, whether it’s a new participant in my fitness class or a new neighbor on my block, I try to make her feel comfortable by starting up a conversation.
- I have a soft spot for the senior women who go to my gym. Whenever I have the time, I always ask how their weekend was and then my conversation usually goes on for at least 30 minutes.
- I can somewhat be the mother of information when it comes to networking. I try my best to always pass info along to other women, especially female business owners.
At the end the day you never know what someone else is going through.